I can't wait...Trey and Katka are almost to Atlanta.
We're so excited to spend the week with them in St. Simons. It's going to be awesome to see them.
They should land in a couple of hours.
The week before last I started going to bootcamp. It's led by some ladies from Trinity, and it's been awesome. We meet at 6am, which means I have to get up everyday at 5:15. We get up early...stretch/ warm up and then start working our abs, arms and legs. Just as soon as our heart rate comes down a bit they send us off on a sprint. It's a great start to my day.
About the same time that bootcamp started Jon left for LA. He was filming a documentary about the Angola Prison. He's back, and we've had a wonderful weekend. After pilates on Saturday we headed to the softball field for practice. It was so hot. I came home with an ocular migraine, which knocked me out for the rest of the day.
We've lived in our neighborhood for five years, and everyday we drive by this little Black church. They always put out the neatest little sayings on their signs, and we imagine them sitting around praying over what to put up each week. We've always wanted to visit, so we did this morning. It was an experience. Wow! Everyone was so welcoming and friendly. I'm so happy they are in our neighborhood, and filling this portion of Atlanta with praises to the Lord. What a blessing.
Since, it was a very long service we had to rush to make it to our next softball practice. We're serious on the Grey team--especially since we lost to the Red team(Shout out to Kelle and Candace--we'll beat you next time;))
We grilled out for dinner, and I'm about to go to bed. Gotta be fresh for boot camp tomorrow. Our drill Sargent is back in town, and I have the feeling she is raring to go.
We're headed to Chicago this week, and then down to Saint Simons next week. My brother and his new wife are coming to town from Belgium, and we can't wait to spend time with them.
We had a nice visit to the St. Pete pier, while in Florida for Memorial Day. Amelia had her first stroll, and we got to tag along. Mr. T jumped in the stroller for a little ride too.
Jon's 97 year old grandmother passed away last weekend, and we are headed down to St. Pete for the service. I'm packing for us, while Jon's shooting an event. As soon as it's done we'll head out. I'm hoping we can get the footage backed up and return all our gear by 2pm. It's long drive especially when we haven't been sleeping. I think Jon got 3 hours last night, which means I'll try and drive most of the way. The service is tomorrow at 10am...we're exhausted. It's going to be an emotional trip. Jon has three grandmothers- it's a long story. I've gone to all three of their funerals, but I only met two of them. He lost two of them within the last three months. Grandma Doris lived with his family for years, and for the last several years had round the clock care. It will be a big change for the entire family. We will miss her so much, and are happy she is at peace with the Lord. She loved him so much- what an amazing women. I'm blessed to have loved her, and I know Jon's the man he is from her influence. Goodbye Grandma Doris.
* A Poem That Grandma Doris quoted all the time
WHAT THE HEART OF THE YOUNG MAN SAID TO THE PSALMIST.
Tell me not, in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream!
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
And things are not what they seem.
Life is real! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal;
Dust thou art, to dust returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.
Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way;
But to act, that each to-morrow
Find us farther than to-day.
Art is long, and Time is fleeting,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muffled drums, are beating
Funeral marches to the grave.
In the world's broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle!
Be a hero in the strife!
Trust no Future, howe'er pleasant!
Let the dead Past bury its dead!
Act,--act in the living Present!
Heart within, and God o'erhead!
Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time;--
Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o'er life's solemn main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, shall take heart again.
Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.
Sometimes a life lesson just smacks you in the face, and that happened tonight with my sweet little yorkie Mr. T. Don't laugh we can all learn something from our pets.
Mr. T was so little that we weren't able to get him until he was almost five months old. He was hovering around 1.5- 2 lbs then, and topped out at 3 lbs. Anyway, we took him to the groomer soon after we picked him up to be tidied up. When Jon and I returned the groomer told us that Mr. T was a nipper, and she wouldn't groom him again until he stopped. We were shocked...he's so sweet and cute, and we hadn't experienced that side of him yet. I started brushing him all the time, and I was stunned. This little sweet 2 lbs darling became a snarling, raving dogs with FANGS. I'm telling you it started with him biting the brush, and quickly moved to him biting my fingers. The only time he does it is if I would catch a snag in his hair, and he would go from a precious pup to a fierce wolf in a second flat.
So I've been working with him for almost a year...trying everything. He has gotten better about it, but tonight we had a breakthrough. He fell asleep when I was brushing him, and one time when it was a little rough he opened his eyes and very gently opened his mouth and slightly closed it on my hand. It was so sweet and gentle. He wanted me to know that it had hurt, but he remained calm and promptly went back to sleep.
It immediately made me think of all the times I turn into a raving beast when someone hurts me. Sometimes it's just because I'm too sensitive and don't trust their intentions. Sometimes it really does hurt, but I don't trust God to deal with them...I have to inflict pain in recourse to the pain that I'm under. I think that God has been gently working on me this past year too. I'd like to be able to calmly tell someone that they are hurting me, and then relax knowing that I can trust God fully to protect me.
"GOD'S promises are not exhausted when they are fulfilled, for when once performed, they stand just as good as they did before, and we may await a second accomplishment of them. Man's promises even at the best, are like a cistern which holds but a temporary supply; but God's promises are as a fountain, never emptied, ever overflowing, so that you may draw from them the whole of that which they apparently contain, and they shall be still as full as ever." C.H. Spurgeon
Psalm 28:7
The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.
So I'm not there yet...but I'm working on it. Thanks Mr. T!
Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hears by the Holy Spirit who was given to us. ~ Romans 5:5
Yesterday it was finally time to tear down a side of our fence. We are moving one side over by about twenty feet, so it's closer to our property line. Yes, our yard is actually growing! We knocked down half of it including the posts, and removed all the nails from the boards so we could reuse them. It has taken a long time to get to this point, since Jon has been building the new fence in his spare time. It was amazing how much we accomplished in an hour of work. It is so much harder to build then destroy. Whether building marriages, families, raising children, going to school we need the Lords protection and we must be vigilant.
Last night we went to play trivia with a good friend that is in town. We saw an obtuse update by his girlfriend on Facebook, and knew something was up with him. It was far worse then anything we imagined. His brother died last week in a car accident, and they had the service on Saturday. His other brother just graduated as a doctor two days later, so it was bittersweet to celebrate his accomplishment while burying their brother. Our friend is a really private person, and struggled to tell us what had happened. We sat at bar trying not to cry as we played trivia and talked about the accident. My heart hurts for him. He'll be in town for awhile, so we'll be getting together again. He did bring his little Maltese, so she and Mr. T have a play date scheduled too. We are praying for his family.
The new Honda commercial is amazing. Check out how they made it with LED lights.
Our last day full day in Prague during our trip last fall was very memorable. We visited a silver mine located in Kutna Hora . Before we went into the mine we were warned not to continue the tour if we have heart problems, claustrophobia, or respiratory issues. I should have stopped then, since the thought of being underground has always filled me with terror. My friend Bevin explored caves during college, and I honestly can't think of anything that is more scary to me then that. So when we arrived at the mine, and I realized what was involved I started to freak out. We had to put on white coats, and really old helmets and walked down a long rusty flight of stairs. It was at least six stories below, and the interior was damp as water dripped down the rock walls. Once we got to the bottom I realized how tight of an area the space was, and I asked the guide to let me climb back up to the top. He wouldn't let me, but then and there I determined to stay right on his heels. He was about 17 years old, and at that point I knew he was my best bet to get out of the mine. We walked hunched over and had to go sideways through some areas with our little lights. I had to just look at his feet and kept saying scripture, and prayers over and over again.
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee" Psalm 56:3 and "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path" Psalm 119:105 these were two verses that I kept repeating over and over again. The 15-20 minutes that we were underground were some of the hardest I've experienced. I had to focus my mind on Jesus to get me through. Literally He kept a panic attack at bay. I've never had one before, but my heart was racing for so long after we emerged-- I almost passed out. It was so intense.
I'm so glad that God gave me that experience. And I'll never think of silver/gold the same way.
It was a physical lesson that reinforced something that the Lord has been teaching me this past year.
I need to be in community. I used to have community, but through a long process of hurts I had started cutting it out of my life. I still went to church, but kept a huge wall up. The betrayal by people I love had hurt so much, so I didn't let anyone get close enough to touch me. Slowly over the last two years I've started letting the walls down. The Lord has been so gentle with me. It amazes me how much I had walled myself in just like the small space I had to fit through in the silver mine. When I came out I realized what freedom I had in Christ, and His love for me. I don't ever want to put myself in that type of isolation again. Recently I started reading Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer, and it has come along at a perfect time. Growing up within really warped community was hard, and it shaped how I see things. A couple of passages have really struck a cord with me.
" Christian community is like the Christian's sanctification. It is a gift of God which we cannot claim."
"Christian brotherhood is not an ideal which we must realize; it is rather a reality created by God in Christ in which we may participate."
"The basis of all spiritual reality is the clear, manifest Word of God in Jesus Christ. The basis of all human reality is in the dark, turbid urges and desires of the human mind. The basis of the community of the Spirit is truth; the basis of the human community of spirit is desire. The essence of the community of the spirit is light, for " God is light, and in him is no darkness at all"(I John 1:5) and "if we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another"(1:7) The essence of the human community of the spirit is darkness, "for from within, out of the hearts of men, proceed all evil thoughts" (Mark 7:21)
The community of the Spirit is the fellowship of those who are called by Christ; human community of spirit is the fellowship of devote souls."
I have to stop at that or I'll quote the entire book. It's short and totally worth the read.
Anyway, this book has helped me understand some of the weirdness in communities that I've been a part of. It's a good thing, since this weekend I learned about widespread sexual abuse in my youth group. It makes me so sad and angry, but I'm grateful to be in a place where I can talk about it. (Thanks girls.) So many of my friends were hurt, and I am praying for their healing as this evil is brought out into the light.
I'm sitting in the closet right now- not for any particular reason except I wanted to work upstairs, and Jon is sleeping in our room. Yes...it's a miracle he's actually asleep at 9:30. He's going to be pulling at least 3x 18 hour days, so he's trying to rest up tonight. That means that I'll be tired too even though I'll sleep for 3-4 more hours after he leaves. When we redid our bathroom and requested dimmers on our lights the contractor couldn't understand. It's for exactly this reason. We have transoms over all our doors, and before anytime you were in the bathroom the light would pour out into our bedroom, now we can dim them. This makes me happy...especially since Jon always gets up at least 2-3 hours before his call time.
Today was really productive for me-- I caught up on a ton of paperwork, and set up my files for 2009, made my third of five meals for people this week, dropped if off, tried to hang some mirrors, had a couple conference calls, worked on two projects, prepared for a meeting tomorrow, and have a minute to check in and say "hello".
Yesterday, I went to a networking meeting at Maggiano's. Lots of people love that place, but the food is way too rich. I'd much rather go to Figo . Anyway, it was good that I went, since I'm trying to really promote our business. I know it's silly but I am much more passionate about promoting other people then us. It just seems wrong to self promote, but then I realized that this is where the Lord has us and I need to give it just as much as I have other jobs. So this monthly event seems like a good way to begin. I sat with a girl from Good Will, and as we talked I realized that though I've shopped and dropped off loads of donations I really didn't have a clue what they really do. They help people find jobs, and have all types of job training. Basically they support families that need help finding jobs.
Things I'm grateful for:
I'm excited that Jon's new DP site is about to launch- he's been shooting so much these last six months.
My cousin and I have started talking recently. It's not like we had a spat and didn't talk- we just didn't call each other. Now we talk every couple of weeks, and recently it's been really good. I'm grateful.
Liz(my sister-in-law) is having a baby shower next weekend, so I'm flying down for the day.
We're finally moving our privacy fence to our property line, and our yard is at least a 1/3 larger.
After that is completed we're going to build a front fence. I can't wait. Everytime I let out the Smartts dogs, and enjoy their front yard it makes me even more excited.
I'm grateful that the Smartts are home from the hospital, and I'm thankful that I've made friends with their dogs. Now I love chihuahua's too.
Our small group is having a pot-luck dinner tomorrow night. The steak is marinading right now. I can't wait- it's going to be yummy.
I spent most of Saturday with my grandparents(my dad's parents). They treated me to the traditional snack as soon as I walked in. Everytime I've ever been to their house my grandmother, Mommy-O has offered me saltine crackers with cheddar cheese, and a bowl of cantaloupe. It doesn't matter if you just had a steak dinner, if you come over for a visit you get a snack. Mine always comes with a cold Dr Pepper. Poppy-O sits down with me and we visit, and Mommy-O and I share the drink. Mommy-O loves dishes, and keeps three tables set at all times. She has numerous china cabinets, and started a Depression Glass collection for my cousin and I when we were born. They still are at Mommy-O's, since they are "safer" there. It makes me feel secure knowing those dishes are on display in her living room where they have been for 29 years.
Yesterday was really special. I sat and talked with Mommy-O for at least two hours, and I asked her all kinds of questions. I heard how she and Poppy-O met and all about their early years of marriage. I learned that she almost died after my dad was born from pneumonia, and had a life threatening allergic reaction after my Aunt Kay was born. I heard how she took the train all the way to TX after marrying my grandfather. Mommy-O had never left Macon, GA and she took the train by herself to meet her new husband. He had to report back to work, and the military flew him. I heard how they camped at a friends house, and finally bought an old twenty foot trailer to live in.
Jon and I have been watching Mad Men, and it just opened my eyes to how my grandparents lived. I didn't realize that Mommy-O would always shower and put on a dress and heels a few minutes before Poppy-O came home. She never knew if he was bringing home guests, so she was always prepared for anything.
We talked about Allen and what it was like when he got sick, and died. She told me how Uncle Terry who was 18 months old would sit on the Tonka Trucks that they use to play on and just cry. He didn't understand why Allen just disappeared. We looked through old pictures, and I found one with all four of her children in it. It's the only "complete" family picture I've ever seen.
Then we had another snack and Poppy-O told me the same story again from his own perspective. I helped him with some "computer" questions, and then Mommy-O and I looked through her old clothes. She keeps everything.
About 20 years ago my grandparents had a falling out with each other. They have very different opinions about something that involves my Uncle Terry. He died before it could be settled, and consequently the bitterness has set in. But yesterday I saw the twinkle of love between them, and it truly was a day that I don't ever want to forget.
This October is their 60th anniversary, and I've started planning a special surprise for them both. My prayer is that this year they would reconcile and fall madly back in love with each other.
Life can be very very hard, and my grandparents have weathered some terrible storms especially with the lose of two sons. But they have lived a grand life too, and I hope the remaining years they have together are filled with love.
